You may have listened to me rant and rave about how unhappy I am in humanity for wanting to stick their dick in their moms all the fucking time. I fucking hate it. Given the things I’ve seen in my lifetime of watching porn, nothing terrifies or revolts me anymore. Once you’ve witnessed a Lithuanian midget dressed as a catholic priest baptizing burn victims in a septic tank outside a trailer park, you become numb to the nightmare of existence. However, taboo is one thing I refuse to become numb to.
Worst Case Senario
Worst of all, the popularity of taboo has swept across the entire planet. I thought perhaps the phenomenon was secluded to the States, but to my great shame, it has traveled far and wide. It would appear Latin culture hasn’t dived in as deep as some others, but Asia and India are up to their necks. If you speak English, Tamil, or Japanese, you might exclusively spend your day watching taboo porn while thumbing through the family photo album.
Today’s subreddit, r/TabooSexStories, has over one hundred and twenty-seven thousand members. That’s fucking terror-inducing. It makes me want to blow the planet up and start fresh as pond scum. We clearly fuck up somewhere along the path of life.
So what the fuck is happening here? Why has taboo become so goddamn prevalent despite theoretically being one of the worst sexual acts you can perform. I think I might have more respect for people who fuck dead bodies. What a sad state of affairs.
I even give animal fucking more credit than I do taboo. At least I can understand the desperation related to sticking your dick in a squirrel. I know there are some unfuckable rednecks out there that just want to jam their dangles in something warm and moist. Sure, it’s fucking horrid, but it’s still a cunt hair better than taboo. No matter what angle of approach I come from, I can’t imagine ever fucking my mom.
Putting a College Degree to Use
Many scientists, phycologists, and sociologists have spent the last decade trying to understand what the fuck is happening to humanity. One theory is that it has zero to do with people actually desiring to bone their aunt. It has to do with the extreme taboo of the deed. It’s the absurdly deviant nature of having sex with an uncle that gets a man’s panties in a bundle. I refuse to accept that answer. There are a thousand and one taboo sexual acts one can get their rocks off with before succumbing to taboo.
Try to think of it like this. If someone put a Desert Eagle against my skull and gave me the option to either fuck my mom or spend a year in jail where I would be kicked in the nuts five times a day, I would spend the year in jail. I don’t have to think about it at all. If I can spend a year in jail getting my balls crushed by steel-toed boots, then you dumb fuck faces can find taboo porn content. For fucks sake. There’s more free porn on the internet than air molecules in the atmosphere. Watch some poop porn, for fucks sake.
When you read the stories and discussions taking place on r/TabooSexStories, you’d think these fuckers were talking about what they’re having for dinner later. None of them appear to have the slightest inkling that taboo could be a taboo subject. It’s been thoroughly normalized in their brains. The human brain can make anything seem normal.
So I’m officially tossing the taboo argument out of the window. Other researchers point to the characterization of taboo in media. For a few years there, “The Game of Thrones” was the most significant show on TV. If you haven’t watched it, I’ll be the one to inform you that it is dripping with taboo. There is even a pair of twins that fuck! You can’t get any more taboo than that. Their kids would come out looking like a puddle of viscera. That’s fine. Taboo can make for great television, even if it doesn’t make for great porn.
From what I can tell, visitors to r/TabooSexStories don’t have time to watch HBO Go. The only thing they have time for is taboo and taboo porn. It’s a fucking lifestyle. These fuckers are dedicated to the craft.
I reject the popular media excuse as well. First off, a single piece of media depicting taboo, even a popular one, doesn’t make up for the thousands of shows, movies, and books that have described it as offensive and disgusting. Second, I didn’t want to start slinging meth after watching “Breaking Bad.” Shows are not a justification for poor behavior. Didn’t Tipper Gore’s dumb ass teach us this in the nineties?
Frequent Flyers
A third theory put forth by sociologists has some credence. The eighty-twenty principle is a sales concept that dictates twenty percent of consumers will consume eighty percent of a product. To put it another way, your regular customers will make you the most money. Porn sites know this, so they make content to serve meat-beating addicts like you and me. Furthermore, masturbation addicts require content that is more and more extreme.
The idea is that most individuals don’t like taboo porn. It’s the fapping addicts that require particularly taboo content to get their rocks off. Casuals are forced to deal with the influx of taboo porn because addicts need a more potent fix.
I get it, but I can only put so much faith in this theory. The reason being is that no man on the planet Earth chokes the chicken to porn more often than I do. I’m the fucking king. If I can find extreme content that doesn’t involve my mother, you can also.
Despite all of this, the fact is that I have a job to do. If people want to turn their family reunions into orgies, and I can’t change their minds, I have to review taboo porn. I make the sacrifice because, in the end, I am a man of the people, and my people need me.
Grandma Has Some Tits On Her
r/TabooSexStories is full of fucked up tales that will stick with me for the rest of my life. All I can do now is regale you with some. “M26 Used to Massage Granny’s Tits. Part 2” is the first story that lept out at me. Compared to part two, part one is nothing.
Part one describes how this dude used to massage his grandma’s shoulders and slowly worked his way to her tits over a few months. I wish I could be more disgusted by that, but part two takes the cake.
In part two, he explains how his grandmother once had an itchy rash under and between her boobs. After watching her scratch all day, M26 asked if she could help.
M26 got some medicated lotion and powder and offered to spread it on for her. He used the opportunity to massage every inch of her tits. Once he was done, he washed his hands and immediately masturbated. At least he had to jerk off. In part one, he just creams his pants.
Babies Mama
It’s hard to top that story, but “I Got My Mom Pregnant Two Years Ago” does its best. This story centers around a “week of passion” experienced between mother and son.
For that week, they fucked each other’s brains out. The son tried all sorts of new shit out on his mom, and she loved it. He even “suckled her breast,” which I assume was done for old times’ sake.
Despite being on birth control, she got preggo. Fortunately, the bitch didn’t keep it. Regardless, I still want to hit these two with my car. What happened to shame? Has the internet ruined shame for us? I’m bringing it back. Some of you savage motherfuckers need some in your life.
Honestly, now that I think about it, I wish they did have the baby. I want to see what that motherfucker would have looked like. The world should see. Maybe that would get a few of you to change your minds about taboo porn.
I doubt it, though. You guys will be taboo lovers until the day you die. I hate it.
However, if you love taboo porn stories, you won’t find a better collection. r/TabooSexStories has everything you need to get your taboo fix. Your reading skills will improve tremendously.
The thing I’d change about r/TabooSexStories is its existence. I would light this subreddit on fire and be done with it.
I hope this article helped some of you feel ashamed, but more than likely, it did the opposite. Look at the lengths I’m willing to go to for my readers.
